https://mastodon.art/@AleF2050

just leaving this here

The real reason i had left Twitter is because the Elon Musk craze had been putting on my nerves a lot, but this nerving out will not last this much so easily. I have to accept the existence and move on.

I am no longer updating my Twitter.

got enough of it.

i'm giving up art for now. i was already burning out anyway no matter what i do, even knowing that art is a marathon.

got excessively mad over weeks of painful frustration as i attempted to cope with it, but every morning i wake up i still come to NOTHING.

Not been able to draw.

Art block turned out to be even more than a simple burn out since days ago.

Still suffer insomnia from sheer overthinking. Must find a way to stay calm.

IT'S FINALLY HERE AFTER 5 YEARS

I'M LITERALLY IN JOY

(besides ignore the wires)

• Find a better and more cleaner sketching workflow
• Learn digital painting the way it sohuld have been / proper idea of how to use structure to paint values, light and color
• Draw more shit doodles without blowing a crap about how i draw hands like leeks without proper idea from references

Still grinding through art so it seems like i can't pull out a finished drawing any sooner as i've been trying to pull my muscles off Twitter, for the good of art portal. https://twitter.com/af2050_art

Right now has become my primary site where i will post sketches. Due to that, i'll tend to forget a lot about continuing my art thread. I really do wish about getting a drawing done, but i've been so busy experimenting with writing down some unusual art prompts i've been brainstorming through during my procrastination times while i try to bodybuild my drawing motivation.

If you wanna catch me up, be sure to check my Twitter.

These weeks i've been not much active here because of the usual stuff, plus still struggling with art block and the tendency of not being able to do anything (not even play videogames whenever i want in the day). Sometimes i favourite one or two things and review them as i please, but besides this it's all nothing at all.

So there's some things i've been getting into during this near end month period:

• I officially have been getting into Hatsune Miku way more than i thought. I've been playing a lot of Project Mirai DX (the Nintendo 3DS spinoff of Project Diva) since months back when i wanted to learn a rhythm game, but got suddenly fascinated by her figure, but actually being a standard anime/manga art / japanese videogame lover means a lot, so i've been trying out FL Studio with Piapro Studio.
• I'm learning Blender (yes, it's the highlight of the article). Reason is, YES, i also want to eventually try out creating anime statues/figures because i don't even really know what to do anymore. My deep conscious is telling me to keep on insisting about doing this stuff for a while, and might probably use my current drawing knowledge to be able to plan out models easier than just do all from scratch without a self-made reference.

I stopped watching a lot of Twitch as i'm attempting to shift my focus on my hobbies and talking with others for a bit...

The bad news? Still feeling rough and mindly weak just as before. Despite writing down ideas i've been brainstorming on drawings i want to make, my anxiety for not being able to hold on reaching my objective and instead relying on my expectations is what prevents me to do that. I really want to do game dev as well, but well, thing is that my weak mind is making me so lazy... i want to get out from it.

Not to mention that recently i've been feeling awkward at the way i write with other people, especially on Discord. Sometimes i write stuff that doesn't make sense while i'm trying to make it feel like authentical phrasing, but apparently, not just my english is that bad enough, but also i tend to be quite dyslexical with my main language (italian) as well...

Yeah, it just feels normal to me that unfortunately it's just the way how i write and talk. I am so grungy.

I made a Twitter acc but it's only going to be an art and lurk account in the meantime cause honestly it's not even a primary platform for posting art at all just like every account i use in other sites to post art.

https://twitter.com/af2050_art

Will have NSFW in it too when it comes